chicago overcoat

I always wanted a friend that could quip in retro 20's, 30's, hardboiled, etc. slang.

Not only did I want a friend like that, I wanted to BE that friend.  

I wanted to be the girl that says stuff like, "Hey there, hep-cat, don't get all cheesed over the boondoggle.  Let's go futz around at the speak-easy, maybe have a go-around with the nibcocked modocs..." and so on and so forth.

In point of fact, I have tried several times to meet this lofty goal and all I get for my troubles are blank stares.  

I playfully call my gal-pal a "roundheels".  She replies, "huh?".

I say, "Now you're on the trolley!".  She asks, "what trolley?  wait.  what?"

I tells ya it takes all the darb out when no cat or bim picks up what yer putting down.